Just what happens when two people in the office strike up a conversation at the water cooler? Plenty of gossip and a touch of flirtation at work no doubt. Pressure Coolers, the UK’s water cooler specialists bring us the top ten office chat up lines we all love to hate…
Every office has its collection of flirts, lotharios, nerds and shy people. Usually they are all sat at their desks alone, or spend their time isolated in their booths on the phone. But, like the animals on the plain, they all come out in force to the local watering hole. Your office water cooler can be the place where star crossed lovers first catch a glimpse of each other, or, most likely, the place where someone tried an unforgettable line on you.
Flirts say the best lines as they are usually only joking and don’t take themselves too seriously. You’ve probably met the office flirt many times at the water cooler, saying;
“I know water does a body good, but wow – how much have you been drinking?”
“You know, you might be asked to leave soon, you’re making the other men/women look really bad.”
“You see my friend over there -[vaguely waving at someone in the office] – he wants to know if you think I’m cute.”
“Is it hot in here or is it just you?”
If this sounds like you, or like someone you know then watch out. If flirts receive just a few too many knock-backs over the quality of their water-cooler conversation, they can easily turn into the office lotharios out of sheer desperation. These super-flirts really do not care whether you like their lines or not because they are going to say them anyway, and they are bound to be outrageous. Spotting a lothario is easy as they may say things like:
“What has 160 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper!”
“You know how some men compensate for certain… shortages, by buying a really expensive car? Well, I don’t even drive.”
However, you might prefer the lothario’s direct streak when faced with the cringe worthy advances of the office shy guy…
“You are the only reason I have come here alone.”
“Were you just smiling at me a moment ago or have I put my contacts in wrongly again?”
Both of which are preferable to the miserable lines trotted out by the office nerd whose path you usually do not cross. A couple of choice ones are:
“Are you busy tonight… at 3am?”
“Can I plug my FireWire into your USB?”
Faced with these lines, Matthew Mitchison, director of Pressure Coolers jokes, “Perhaps people will be encouraged to make more use, or better use, of their office water cooler from now on.” One thing is certain, office flirtation around the water cooler is a natural phenomenon which should be allowed to continue unabashed and unabated.
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